It starts with who—and what—you surround yourself with.

Every morning, I get to live what feels like the dream.

I head to shul a bit early for Shacharit. And I don’t rush out.

After davening, I stay.

I do Shnayim Mikra, say some Tehillim, whisper a few extra tefilot, and then sit down to learn—with my first cup of coffee of the day.

Before the chaos of the world kicks in… I’m already centered.

There’s something quiet and powerful about that time.

A few others stick around too. Everyone is focused. Learning. Growing.

It’s not loud—but it’s loud in the best way.

You can feel the spiritual energy in the room.

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One Spark Leads to Another

This morning, I had a conversation with one of the regulars at shul—someone I often see surrounded by sefarim, flipping through pages with focus and purpose.

I’ve got my own learning path (I’m working through the entire Torah), but I couldn’t help but ask what he was working on.

He told me he’s been learning halachot he never had the chance to cover before. He’s keeping up with his Gemara. And—what really inspired me—he’s going through new commentaries on Chumash (that I’d like to learn), cover to cover.

The spark? His son.

His son has been learning a third of a new commentary each week alongside his Shnayim Mikra and has already completed several full commentaries this way. Watching that consistency and drive moved him. So he decided to start going through new commentaries—at his own pace, but with the same sense of purpose.

One spark led to another.

That’s the beauty of being surrounded by people who are growing. Their energy lifts you. Their consistency challenges you. Their passion ignites something inside of you.

Growth becomes contagious.

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Your Brain Becomes What You Feed It

Here’s something amazing: your brain is always changing. It literally rewires itself based on what you see, hear, and focus on.

That’s the idea behind neuroplasticity—a fancy word for the brain’s ability to adapt and be shaped by its environment.

And that’s both the beauty—and the danger—of being human.

If your daily input is Torah, gratitude, kindness, and purpose, your mind starts to reflect that.

But if your world is filled with distraction, negativity, and mindless scrolling… that becomes your default too.

You’ve probably heard the quote:

“If you’re not paying for the product, you are the product.”

Social media, ads, and endless entertainment are crafted to hijack our attention. Not to help us grow—but to keep us hooked.

That’s why it matters so much who—and what—we let into our lives.
Because whether we realize it or not, our environment is always shaping us.

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The Torah Always Knew This

Judaism has always understood the power of environment.

We live near our shuls because we keep Shabbos.

We build communities so we can grow together.

We fill our homes with reminders of who we are—mezuzot on the doors, sefarim on the shelves, tefillin in their place, and other sacred objects that quietly shape the atmosphere.

Pirkei Avot says:

“Acquire for yourself a friend.”

Not “find.” Acquire. Do what it takes.

Because Hashem didn’t create us to be independent.

He created us to be influenced—and to choose our influences wisely.

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From Fitness to Faith: Your Environment Shapes Your Identity

I’ve been going for walks lately. One evening, I saw something that stayed with me:

An entire family was out running together. Three sisters up front, their brother behind, and both parents jogging along.

They didn’t become a “running family” overnight.

They created the environment. They modeled the behavior. And now—it’s just who they are.

What if our homes became “davening homes”?
“Gratitude homes”? “Torah-learning homes”?

What if our communities made growth the norm, not the exception?

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Want Your Kids to Love Shabbos? You Go First.

I was once speaking at a Shabbos Project event and during Q&A, someone asked me:

“How do you get your kids to love Shabbos?”

I told him: “By loving Shabbos.”

When your kids see the joy in your eyes before Shabbos… when they hear the music, feel the peace, see the excitement—they want in.

But if Shabbos feels like a burden…
If mitzvot are done with groaning or indifference…
We shouldn’t be surprised when the next generation opts out.

Rav Moshe Feinstein lamented:

Many Jews didn’t walk away from Torah. They walked away from the attitude toward a Torah life that “it’s hard to be a Jew”.

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You Are the Average of the Five People You Spend the Most Time With

So… who are your five?

• Do they lift you up?
• Do they bring you closer to who you want to be?
• Do they remind you of Hashem’s presence in your life?

For me, the answer is yes—and I’m so grateful.

One of my neighbors doesn’t say a word during davening. His quiet intensity and kavanah inspire everyone around him. And he’s one of the biggest baalei tzedakah I know—not for giving the most, but for how he gives: through thoughtful action and a program he built that does real good and inspires others to give more.

Another neighbor is my chavruta. We learn Shaar HaBitachon together, and every so often I’ll get a text from him that just says, “Nu?”, “Let’s Learn!”, or “Let’s gooo!”—and just like that, I’m back in the mindset. Back in the growth.

And my wife… she amazes me. She’s constantly working on herself—on her growth, her middot, and her bitachon. She davens with such sincerity and focus. And not only does she say a ton of Tehillim, but she gets others involved too—rallying women to finish the entire Tehillim almost every night.

The more we’re around people like this—people who daven with kavanah, speak kindly, learn with passion, and live with bitachon…

The more it becomes our default too.

Not out of pressure. Just… naturally.

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Challenge of the Week

Look at the people and content around you this week.

Who (or what) are the five voices you hear most often?

Are they helping you live the dream—or distracting you from it?

Pick one upgrade: one person, one habit, one influence that lifts you higher.

Even one shift in your environment can change everything.

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Final Thought: Set Your Surrounding, and It Will Set You

Yes, real change comes from within.

But the Torah reminds us: it also comes from without.

From your home.
Your friends.
Your community.
Your habits.
Your daily feed.

Want to love Shabbos? Be around people who cherish it.
Want to grow in emunah? Learn with someone who lives it.
Want your children to love Judaism? Let them see you dance with it.

Because if there’s one truth you can’t ignore, it’s this:

You become what you surround yourself with.

And that’s how you start living the dream.